Bush vs. Kerry – Tuesday’s going to be very interesting

I’m watching this American election closely and I have my thoughts about who should win (John Kerry) and why (he’s not George W. Bush).

It’s a sad day when you have to choose between the lesser of two evils. Anyone with half a brain knows that neither one of these two will stand up for the rights of the poor or the working people – it’s all about money and power, plain and simple. But that isn’t why I’m blogging today.

I received an e-mail from Crosswalk – a Christian web site that I get daily scripture and thoughts from. When I read this, I was shocked. It’s pretty much a declaration to vote for Bush.

Honestly, I don’t know how anyone who says that he/she is a Christian would vote for that man. Yes, I’m not down with homosexual marriage or abortion and the Republican Party doesn’t endorse either of these. But when a so-called Christian man leads an attack on a country of innocent people (look, the Iraqi guy who is going to work in the morning to pay his bills and buy food didn’t do anything to any of us) instead of chasing down the real villain (where is Bin Laden? Have we even heard his name called in recent months?), I have to question his motives.

I saw a Primetime Live or 20/20 segment about how the American government is just ignoring veterans who were injured in Iraq – just leaving them without jobs, money or a pat on the back. Men and women who chose to join the military are now forced to fight in a war that many people believed was injust and founded on lies. How can this same Bush say that he is a man of God? Christians are supposed to be a sympathetic bunch – not a war-mongering group.

Yes, Kerry may not be the saviour that country is looking for, but in the grand scheme of things, he may be the lesser of the evils. The United States and millions of innocent Americans are reviled across the globe because of a man who doesn’t have the common sense that a president of a world power should have.

I pray that Christians around the United States don’t allow someone using the name of God to pull the wool over their eyes.

If Bush is victorious come November 2, God help us all.

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Statement Regarding Biblical Issues in the 2004 Elections
October 2004

A note from the Editor:

While we may choose to disagree on certain matters of public policy, or support different political parties, the fact remains that we as Christians have an objective standard of truth - the Bible - to base our decisions on. No matter how complex or contemporary the debate might be, the Bible speaks to it. That's why it's critical to spend time understanding what the Bible says about the important issues of today – and the 2004 Elections.The following statement - recently prepared and endorsed by more than 80 Christian leaders - is presented for the thoughtful consideration of all who are interested in how the Bible might speak to ethical issues in the current political contests.

A full list of those endorsing this message can be found here: http://www.crosswalk.com/news/1290875.html

1. Supreme Court justices: People may not consider the appointment of Supreme Court Justices to be an ethical issue, but it clearly is now because several of the Court's decisions have imposed on our nation new policies with significant ethical and religious ramifications.

A slim majority of our current Supreme Court -- and lower courts which follow their example -- have gone beyond their Constitutionally-defined task of interpreting laws passed by Congress and state legislatures, and have in effect created new "laws" that have never been passed by any elected body. By this process they have imposed on "the people" decrees that allow abortionists to murder unborn babies (contrary to Exodus 20:13 and Romans 13:9, "you shall not murder"), protect pornographers who poison the minds of children and adults (contrary to Exodus 20:17, "You shall not covet ... your neighbor's wife; see also Matt. 5:28), that redefine marriage to include homosexual couples (thus giving governmental encouragement to actions that Romans 1:26-28 says are morally wrong), and that banish prayer, God's name and God's laws from public places (thus prohibiting free exercise of religion, and violating Romans 13:3 which says that government should be "not a terror to good conduct, but to bad"). In taking to itself the right to decree such policies, the Supreme Court has seriously distorted the system of "checks and balances" intended by the Constitution between the legislative, executive, and judicial branches of government.

It is unlikely that any elected body such as a city council, state legislature, or the U.S. Congress, would have decreed policies like those mentioned above, for such groups are accountable to the will of the people. Not so the Supreme Court, which is appointed for life. And democratically-elected members of Congress and state legislatures are helpless to change those Court-mandated policies unless the makeup of the Court is changed. We believe the ethical choice is a President and U.S. Senate committed to appointing judges who will follow the original intent of the Constitution -- interpret law, not create it; enforce the will of the people, not thwart it -- rather than candidates who have often voted to block such judges in votes in the Senate.

2. Defense against terrorists: A fundamental responsibility of government is to "punish those who do evil" (1 Pet. 2:14) and thus to protect its citizens. We now face a unique challenge, because terrorists who will sacrifice their own lives in killing others cannot be deterred by the usual threat of punishing a criminal after he commits a crime. While Jesus instructed individuals not to seek personal revenge but to turn the other cheek (Matt. 5:39), the Bible instructs that governments are responsible to "bear the sword" (Rom. 13:4) and use force to oppose violent evil. We believe the ethical choice is support for a candidate who will pursue terrorists and, when necessary, use force to stop them before they strike us; not for a candidate who only promises to respond if we are attacked again.

3. Abortion: The Bible views the unborn child as a human person who should be protected, since David said to God, "You knitted me together in my mother's womb" (Psalm 139:13; see also Psalm 51:5; 139:13; Luke 1:44), and strong penalties were imposed for endangering or harming the life of an unborn child (Exodus 21:22-23). We believe the ethical choice is for candidates who believe government should give protection to the lives of unborn children, and not for those who assert that people have a right to murder their unborn children.

4. Homosexual marriage: The Bible views marriage as between one man and one woman, for "a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh" (Gen. 2:24; Eph. 5:31). Because our courts have shown a troubling tendency to overturn the laws that have already been passed concerning marriage, we believe the ethical choice is for candidates who support a Constitutional amendment defining marriage as between one man and one woman.

5. Embryonic stem cell research: Creating more human embryos for the purpose of harvesting their stem cells is contrary to the command, "You shall not murder" (Exodus 20:13). There is a logical and superior alternative: using adult stem cells for medical research, because this does not destroy the life of the adult whose cells are used. We believe the ethical choice is for a candidate who has decided he will not allow government funds to be spent to create more human embryos just to take their stem cells.

6. Natural resources: God put human beings on the earth to "subdue it" and to "have dominion" over the animals (Gen. 1:28). We value the beauty of the natural world which God created, and we believe that we are called to be responsible stewards who protect God's creation while we use it wisely and also seek to safeguard its usefulness for future generations. The Bible does not view "untouched nature" as the ideal state of the earth, but expects human beings to develop and use the earth's resources wisely for mankind's needs (Gen. 1:28; 2:15; 9:3; 1 Tim. 4:4). In fact, we believe that public policy based on the idealism of "untouched nature" hinders wise development of the earth's resources and thus contributes to famine, starvation, disease, and death among the poor. We believe the ethical choice is for candidates who will allow resources to be developed and used wisely, rather than for candidates indebted to environmental theories that oppose nearly all economic development in our nation and around the world.

7. Should Christians speak out and try to influence our nation on these issues? God's people in the Bible often addressed ethical issues with their governmental rulers. Daniel told the Babylonian king Nebuchadnezzar to practice "righteousness" and to show "mercy to the oppressed" (Dan. 4:27); several Old Testament prophets speak to foreign nations about their sins (Isaiah 13-23; Ezekiel 25-32, Amos 1-2, Obadiah (to Edom), Jonah (to Nineveh), Nahum (to Nineveh), Habakkuk 2, Zephaniah 2); and Paul spoke to the Roman governor Felix "about righteousness and self-control and the coming judgment" (Acts 24:25).

As Christian leaders, we agree that the primary message of the New Testament is the good news about salvation through faith in Jesus Christ. But the primary message is not the entire message, and another significant part of the New Testament provides instruction regarding how people should live. In addition to the issues already mentioned, the Bible also teaches us about the types of laws and regulations governments should pursue and enforce.

The laws of a nation have a significant influence on that nation's moral climate, for good or for ill. This is because laws can either restrain evil or encourage it, and because laws also have a teaching function as they inform people about what a government thinks to be right and wrong conduct.

Therefore we urge pastors and Bible study leaders to teach on these crucial ethical issues facing our nation. We urge all Christians to remember their moral obligation to learn about the candidates' positions, to be informed, and to vote. We urge all Christians to pray that truthful speech and right conduct on both sides would prevail in this election. We also encourage Christians to consider doing even more for the good of our nation, such as giving time or money, or talking to friends and neighbors, or even serving in office themselves. Such influence for good on the direction of our country is one important way of fulfilling Jesus command, "You shall love your neighbor as yourself" (Matt. 22:19).

This statement has been affirmed and endorsed by more than 80 Christian leaders. A full list can be found here: http://www.crosswalk.com/news/1290875.html

Messages from work…

I’m trying to make work as entertaining as possible. It helps when you work with… um… err… interesting characters. Where I work is a crazy place with crazy characters – especially the dude I sit next to.

He sent this e-mail at 10:40 last night… Hope you weren’t still here. And thanks for letting me share the jokes!

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Subject: I swear, if I come into work late tomorrow

...’cause I was busy chatting with a 'not so attractive girl' online I'm gonna get sooo mad.

Seriously, I always get caught in that trap. So I'm perusing around Lava looking for some hotties and someone sends me an IM. I go to her profile and she has no pic. Now, I'm in a dilemma. Do I: a) not bother talking to her cause she ain't got no pic YO!; or b) take a chance cause you never know. I always take b) unfortunately.

So here I am IM'ing with this girl back and forth making her laugh as only I know how....telling her my dreams of becoming an ethnic Spiderman and all. I've got her hooked. So, I'm working it and always dropping hints about her pic. Finally, she decides to cave and sends it over.

As I'm anticipating the download, I get that little voice in the back of my head saying, if she's NSA - not so attractive, are you going to be a jerk like you always are, block her from MSN and run away screaming like a little girl or be a man about it? So the pic comes in and she's NSA. :( O. very sad. So she's waiting for my response after a 1/2 a minute of my initial shock and I send back a joke like - see, now was that so hard? It totally worked. Making jokes during uncomfortable situations really gets you out of a lot of jams - that's how I got through Toastmasters. All my speeches near the end were stand-up comedy routines.

Anyway, so I figure that I have to be a man about this since I'm venturing out to the entrepreneurial world and I need practice. So what I did is, and guys you're going to love this, I went back to Lava, looked for a really HOT girl and had her picture up next to my MSN window and pretended like I was chatting with her. I know. :) Anyway, I told her that I have 3 year cycles and that's why I'm quitting my job and that boredom after 3 years carries over to my relationships. And on top of that, the second longest relationship I had was for two months. She told me that she had to cut the convo short cause her sister had to use her computer.

FREEDOM!!!!

Keep on keepin' on

It seems like many of my brethren and sistren are going through the same issues that I’m facing on the employment front. It’s really easy to just complain, but instead of constant complaining, it’s important that we try to make a change. And, also be grateful that we are employed because there are many people out there who would be happy to be in our positions. That’s not to say you can’t point out foolishness when it rears its ugly head.

So to help you keep on keepin’ on while we’re working, here are a couple of things that have helped me get through.

Psalm 23 – For the Work Place

The Lord is my real boss, and I shall not want.
He gives me peace, when chaos is all around me.
He gently reminds me to pray before I speak and to do all things without murmuring and complaining.
He reminds me that He is my Source, and not my job.
He restores my sanity every day and guides my decisions that I might honour Him in everything I do.
Even though I face absurd amounts of e-mails, system crashes, unrealistic deadlines, budget cutbacks, gossiping co-workers, discriminating supervisors, and an ageing body that doesn’t co-operate every morning.
I will not stop – for He is with me!
His presence, His peace and His power will see me through.
He raises me up, even when they fail to promote me.
He claims me as His own, even when the company threatens to let me go.
His faithfulness and love are better than any bonus cheque.
His retirement plan beats every RRSP plan there is!
When it’s all said and done, I’ll be working for Him a whole lot longer and for that, I bless his name.

The senior pastor of my church put together a list about choosing the kind of day you’re going to have. Often we fret, complain and moan about life – but think about it like this: some people didn’t wake up to day. So, if you’re reading this, you’re better off today than a lot of people.

It’s my job to choose what kind of day I’m going to have:

• Today, I can react angrily to the alarm clock going off or I can be thankful I woke up.
• Today, I can complain because the weather is rainy or I can be thankful that the grass is getting watered for free.
• Today, I can lament over all that my parents didn’t give me when I was growing up or I can be thankful that I made it this far.
• Today, I can whine because I have to go to work or study or I can be happy because I have a job or place to study to go to (Preach it, pastor!)
• Today, I can mourn my lack of friends or a significant other or I can think about the day that I discover a meaningful relationship.
• Today, I can feel sad about the heating/car/Visa bill or I can be thankful that I have a furnace, private transportation and some credit.
• Today, I can be annoyed by the person singing off-key in church or be thankful that I can hear. (And, you know the Bible says, make a joyful noise – not tune – noise.)
• Today, I can grumble about my health or I can rejoice that I’m alive.

Today stretches ahead of me waiting to be shaped. And here I am, the sculptor who gets to do the shaping. What today will be like is up to me. I get to choose what kind of day I have.

Celebrity hotties

Everyone needs some frivolity in her life, the Urban Sista is no different.

Yes, I have my bonafide, but I have my celebrity boyfriends as well. This is my -- err, shallow side talking. These guys weren't chosen because of their personalities or because they've done something noteworthy. I chose them just because I think they're cute. You may agree or disagree at will :)

So, enjoy my top 10 celebrity boyfriends:

10) LL Cool J. My head is sprung. James Smith has been on my top 10 list since the early '90s and he's still going strong. But I'm a little concerned -- brother's looking a bit too buff and sculpted. Looking a bit too much like LL Cool J from 'Round The Way Girl -- a video released 10 years ago. Maybe it's just good genes or did he have some help... You be the judge.

9) Brian J. White. A newcomer to the list, but still a hotboy. He's currently co-starring with Bernie Mac in Mr. 3000 and the new UPN sitcom, Second Time Around.

8) Eddie Cibrian. Eddie first graced us when he was on some daytime soap operas (I'm not a soap opera fan, but I believe it was The Young & The Restless... Matt Clark... was that his name?). He's moved up to nighttime drama on Third Watch with another hottie (Coby Bell). Cuba here I come.

7) Raphael Saddiq. I know, I know. When he was in Tony Toni Tone, he was kinda skinny and buck-toothed, but my man has aged well! When I saw him and D'Angelo commiserating on You Should Be Here, I realized the man deserved to be on my hotboy list.

6) David Beckham. I've gotta give a shout to my man from Real Madrid. There's something about Becks that has him firmly on the list. Alas, he's too much man for Posh ;)

5) Alex Rodriguez. DR in the house. I swear, the Dominican Republic must have, per capita, the best-looking men in the world. No World Series for you, but we'll see you next year.

4) Henry Simmons. Wow. This is the beautiful brother on NYPD Blue. I don't watch the show, but I do appreciate the eye candy.

3) Denzel Washington. We have to give Denzel his props. My man is close to 50 (if he's not 50 years old already) and he was looking GOOD in Training Day. Denzel will always be on this list.

2) Boris Kodjoe. Sigh. Wow. Yum. See him with (hottie #9) on Second Time Around.

My number one celebrity boyfriend is...

1) Taye Diggs! From the time I saw How Stella Got Her Groove Back, I was in love. He impressed me even more with his cute, intellectual looks in one of my favourite movie, The Best Man. He looks like a guy we all went to college with (or met back in our college/university days). Taye is currently in Toronto taping a UPN drama, Kevin Hill.

So there's my list of celebrity cuties. Of course, it changes and fluctuates depending on who's around and hot at that particular moment. There are some honourable mentions: Ginuwine, D'Angelo, Flex Alexander, Will Smith and Will Lemay. One day, boys, you too may make it on my list ;)

Do I really have to work?

This morning my director asked me if I’m working to rule.

That’s a great idea! I thought. Maybe if I try it, he’d give me a damned raise and a title change. I’m saying, he already thinks that’s what’s going on.

Folks, I’m bored at work. BORED. Not a little unmotivated, not going through a slump, I’m bored and I feel like there is nothing I can do about it.

If I have to attend one more dry meeting about pricing plans and upcoming product launches or if I have to stay late one more night working on something – something that should have been done weeks ago by someone else – I’m going to run screaming out of this building.

And if I do run screaming out of the building, will I get some time off? ‘Cause, obviously, I’m stressed out.

I’m looking for a new opportunity. Something fresh. Something fun. I want a new job. I am so tired of being tired of work. Look, it’s either I find new employment or I find a rich boyfriend (you’re still wonderful and all, hon ;))

It has gotten that bad. Don’t get me wrong, for the most part, I like the people I work with. I even like some of the people I work for, but I’m at the brink. The brink of saying, “kiss my tail, I’m out.”

But then I remember, I have bills to pay.

And a mortgage.

And I like to travel.

And my boyfriend isn’t The Donald.

So, telling anyone in management to kiss anything would be sorta detrimental to my way of life.

Oh. Now, I’m told that I can’t use any other font besides Arial 11 point. Could someone please tell me how this will affect the business? Is there not anything else more pressing that we should be discussing. Seriously, is there not real work that needs to be done? Why should there be emails about me using Century Schoolbook or Tahoma?

[INSERT TEETH KISSING]

I’ve been searching for something new. A new job. A new volunteer opportunity. Anything new would break the monotony and my desire to kick someone for something new each day. My creativity is being stifled more and more each day. And I’m getting sicker and sicker of complaining about work.

About what I do in the time that’s provided. I can’t create an entire media launch kit in two hours – it doesn’t work like that.

About why my title can’t change after four years, but my responsibilities can. And of course, I’m not being paid for those extra responsibilities.

Sigh. I'll keep you updated on what happens next...

Romantic Realism

Hey if Oprah and Dr. Phil can make good money on doing this kinda stuff, why shouldn't I try? I'm going to do a little thing every so often called, Romantic Realism. Just some tidbits that I've picked up over the years...

Is romance dead?
I like candy, diamonds and flowers as much as the next chick, but in 2004, does that equal romance? Back in the '50s that was the deal -- men went all out to woo women. But today... can we expect that? Modern, cosmopolitan women -- whether you're in a large city, a small town or an island -- need to realize that what you're expecting from our men may just be unrealistic.

Men, realize that women need romance in their lives. There's nothing wrong with sending her flowers out of the blue. Women, realize if we say we're 'independent' we need to act that way. Men shouldn't feel like they have to break the bank to show you how much they care.

Are you Ms. Right?
I'm tired of hearing women complain that all men are dogs, when some of these same chicks are chickenheads. If a woman doesn't have anything, doesn't have a pot to piss in and isn't planning to get one, but still thinks she should be with a multi-millionaire. Or the girl who is clearly bitter and dysfunctional and is really not ready or able to be in a real relationship with anyone, but is vex when men can fully see the problems. And we can't forget the desperate girl, who thinks every man is a potential husband.

We've all been these chicks at some point, but the sad part is that the vast majority of us are deluding ourselves. If you want to find Mr. Right, you have to be Ms. Right. Don't put all the blame on the men, some of us have our own issues we have to deal with.

Are looks the only thing you're interested in?
I don't look like Beyoncé. I don't look like Alicia Keys. I'm not a supermodel and most women aren't. Men meet great girls who don't look like video girls and have absolutely no interest in them. Oh, but when they meet a hotgirl -- it's done. But guess who's majorly surprised when she treats his average tail like scum. Looks are important, but only to a point. If you dash away a great average girl for a stupid beauty, that's on you, but don't complain.

Not all us look like Melyssa Ford and not all of you look like Boris Kodjoe, so be realistic about it. We all know looks fade, but personality and character will last a lifetime.

From Toronto to New York, with love

Bus trips.

Like everyone else, I'm a sista trying to save some money. I've got bills to pay, I've got a mortgage and I'm planning to buy a car sometime next year. So, whenever I can get a deal, I'm going to take it. All of this sets up why, a savvy traveler like yours truly would take a bus trip -- not a Greyhound bus, but a chartered bus -- to New York City.

Honestly, if I can't pay JetsGo or Air Canada to fly me to the Big Apple, I ain't going. Let me share "the bus trip e-mail" that I sent to a few people -- before my blogging days -- with you...

I just got back from New York and I'm so tired. I went on a bus trip and I will never, NEVER, do that again. It was ridiculous. First of all, the bus arrived at the pick up spot two hours late. When it got there, the other passengers ran to the bus doors like a herd of cattle. I never did a bus trip before, so I didn't know the protocol. So, the people (a group of Jamaicans, a few Bajans, a couple of Guyanese and a family of Filipinos) are saving seats on the bus. I got down to the back of the bus, put my bag on a seat to save it for my sister, Donna and our friend, Karen and I sat across from them. A woman, fighting and pushing made her way to the back of the bus. The only seats left were by the toilet. Sorry, as I learned, you snooze, you lose.

The woman, looking perturbed in her reddish wig, looked at my bag and bawled, "A who bag dat!"

"It's my bag," I said.

"Move de bag!" she hollered at me. "Nuh saving seat foolishness!" And with that, she grabbed my bag. But wait. Every last seat at the front of bus had bags on them, why is she up in my face trying to move my bag? Because she believed that I would be scared by her belligerence and ignorance assuming that I was some 19-year-old. But I was a big, hardback 28-year-old woman who paid good money for this trip. I dragged the bag out of her hand and began to holler back, "Don't touch my bag! You leave that right where it is!"

In these situations, you have to establish the roles. I would not be badgered for this ride because this woman thought that 'me an' she weren't size'. I was just as much woman as her, she had to recognize.

For the purposes of this, let's call her Rudy, 'cause she was rude and ill-mannered. Rudy looked shocked. She dropped the bag back on the seat and sat in the seat behind it, grumbling and cursing me. If I wasn't a Child of the King, I don't know what I would have told her. Put your hands on my stuff? You must be insane.

Alas, it only got worse from there.

The bathroom on the bus had no running water and the light wouldn't turn on. I'm not trying to pee in the dark, so I didn't use the bathroom during that 10-hour trip, unless we were stopped at a rest stop. Great, we stopped twice.

We finally made it to the U.S. border in Buffalo, NY. The customs agent came on the bus and asked every passenger, "What's the nature of your trip?" and "What's your nationality?" to the people who weren't Canadian citizens. Rudy and her friend, Ms. Piggy -- she also had no manners -- started getting vex with the customs agent, "why he have to know where mi come from?" Hello, it's his job and if you're not a Canadian citizen, he's going to ask you a question.

The officer kindly asked us to get off the bus and take all of our belongings with us because they were going to run the dogs. Dogs? What kind of think was that? I assumed it was because of 9-11, but the group behind Donna, Karen and I started to carry on.

Look, it's late, I'm tired, just get to France off the bus and let the man do the darned thing.

We all got off the bus and lined up our bags and waited for the dog to come. Why did the people start to carry on. "Bring de dog! Me cold out 'ere!" Lord have mercy -- just hush your mouth. Are you trying to annoy the customs officer? Just behave, let them run the dogs and be done with it so I can get my cold backside back on the bus and get to New York before I kill someone.

The dog came. The dog sniffed. The dog didn't smell a darned thing besides some ackee and saltfish and some harddough bread. We piled back on the bus, with Rudy, Ms. Piggy and friends still acting the ass.

The driver drove like a bat out of hell on the rickety piece of crap bus. The thing had no shocks and no suspension -- a horse and buggy would have been a better mode of transportation, it would have been more comfortable. Every time I fell asleep, he would drive over a twig and I'd be shaken awake. And the blasting music.

Good Lord.

I like my gospel, but a 12:30 am -- after a long day at work and a long drive ahead -- I want to sleep. I was miserable. I had to pee and I was disgruntled by Rudy and Ms. Piggy in the back. It wasn't a pleasant trip.

Saturday

Finally, we arrived in NYC on Saturday morning around 7 am. I was excited -- I was going to take a hot shower, brush my teeth, change into my cute shopping outfit and hit the road. We pulled into the hotel, only to find out, the organizer didn't get early check-ins for us and the room wouldn't be ready until 3 pm. Not a problem, she said. Let's go shopping!

Umm... wait.

I've been on a bus for 10 hours. I haven't bathed, washed my face or brushed my teeth -- I refused to walk the streets of New York stink and musty with dragon breath and a crusty face. So, guess what? We got one room to change in. Thirty-six women and two men had one room to change in. Guess you know how that went down. Donna, Karen and I ended up sitting in the hotel lobby vex and spitting fire because we were foul and in a foul mood. So, the trip organizer asked us what was wrong. Well, we let her know -- we're musty and we can't five minutes in the room to freshen up. I was annoyed as heck not to be able to take a shower, but I was at least going to freshen myself up. People don't have to know that I'm a stinkroot, they don't have to smell me on approach.

Within 10 minutes, we were alone in the room -- with only about 20 minutes to get ready before the bus left. Now, if I had thought about my plans, I would have said, "Girls, let's catch a cab and go to Manhattan to do some shopping." But being the naive fool that I was, I assumed that I would be going to a mall with a Victoria Secret and I would be happy. Guess again.

We changed, left the room looking 90% better and the bus drivers were all up in our grills. Negro, please. I ain't going for no dude who drives a rickety bus. At least if the bus was up to par, you could say he'd have a career as a bus driver, but it was a piece a crap and I was praising God that I got to Queens, NY in one piece.

Off we went to the flea market. I love flea markets and a couple of hours there would have been cool. But really, I didn't travel 10 hours to spend all day at one. These people wanted to spend three and four hours at the flea market. I'm saying, that's kinda ridiculous. So, we all compromised: we were going to spend two hours at the flea market, then we were going to Jamaica Ave., then we (the young people) wanted to go to a mall. We were asked to return to the bus for 12 pm. Donna, Karen and I looked around, got some deals and returned to the bus promptly at 12 noon.

Why were there only six people one the bus? The rest didn't waltz back until 1:30 pm. I was blazing mad ('cause the bright bus drivers opened the sun roof and the noon-day sun was baking me like chicken wing).

Finally, everyone was on the bus with all of their parcels and we went down to Jamaica Ave. But the bus drivers didn't know which part of Jamaica Ave. to drop us off at. Oh, the smarts those two had -- instead of flirting with us at the hotel, maybe they could have looked on a map or asked the hotel concierge a question. So, we spent a good half an hour driving aimlessly up and down the road. Finally, at 2 pm, we parked and they let us out. At first, I was pleased. There was an Old Navy and a Gap -- we thought, "mall!". But, alas, I was disappointed again. I spent three hours walking up and down Jamaica Ave. I got a pair of $5 shoes, some hair products for my friend and some Aleve.

Remember, I haven't mentioned stopping for something to eat. But that comes later...

It's now 5 pm on a hot, late May afternoon in NYC. I should be cursing myself for spending all of my USD, but that wasn't the case. The bunch of unruly, disgusted, own-way brats we were rolling with waited to go to Pitkin Ave. What happened to the mall? It's after 5 pm, the stores on the street are going to be closed. But a mall will be open until at least 9 pm. No, no one listened to my voice of reason -- that would make must too much sense. Off to Pitkin Ave. we went and, as we predicted, every darned thing was closed. So, now I'm tired, unwashed, vex and sour because I couldn't get to a Victoria Secret -- the one store I was dreaming of doing some damage in.

The organizer said, "let's get some food." Our faces lit up because all I had consumed for the day was a hotdog, a Special K bar and some lemonade. The bus pulled up to a gas station and a Popeye's and we're told: "go get some chicken and come back to the bus."

I almost died.

Rudy and Co. had already called us 'stush' and I really don't think I am stush, but Popeye's at a gas station? That's just not right. After the trip down, we couldn't go to proper place and have a bite? I had to get greasy chicken after I spent the entire day hungry and tired? You don't do people like that. Especially people who paid good money to be taken around NYC. The Popeye's was in the projects -- at least as project-like as I've ever seen -- and three people demanded their bags and to be left behind to wait for their family. I understand that gas is expensive, but would you make your poor old Canadian auntie wait in the midst of the projects with her bags and parcels?

Thankfully, Donna called her New York boyfriend to pick us up and take us to a proper place for dinner. He dropped by around 7:30 pm (by this time, I have a hunger headache) to take us to the Olive Garden. I feasted on Chicken Parmigiana -- not Popeye's.

Sunday

We decided to leave the ragtag bunch and go off on our own. Donna's friend took us to downtown Brooklyn where I fell in love with a store called Conway. The stuff was wonderful and cheap -- just the way I like my trendy stuff to be. It was a discount department store of sorts. I was all grins. Then we went to Macy's where I bought a wonderful bright red Fossil wallet. We were told to meet the bus at the corner of Church and Flatbush at 1 pm. Saddened that, after the terror of Saturday, the wonder of Sunday was over too quickly, we drove down there to meet the rest of the crew.

There was no bus. And barely anyone there.

We hung out there for a bit and started to get hungry. Seeing that the majority of people were in a restaurant chowing down, Donna's friend decided to take us to a soul food restaurant in Queens. One of the guys we drove down with exchanged numbers with me because he was going to be staying with his cousin and he wanted be able to reach someone on the trip. I asked him to give me a ring when the bus arrived. We drove off, leaving the rude bunch on the corner.

It was like 2:30 pm and I hadn't heard from anyone. Karen started to panic, thinking that we had been left behind. We rushed back to Brooklyn. By 3 pm we were waiting on the corner and still there was no bus. People were getting rank (it was 90 degrees outside) and vex because they were just standing on a street corner with luggage waiting. But I didn't feel for most of them because they were wretches. This was poetic justice as far as I was concerned.

So, we decided to go to the mall in Queens. What's the point of waiting in the elements, when I can be in an air-conditioned mall with a Victoria Secret? Robin (my friend from the bus) promised to call as soon as he heard something. As we're driving, I get a call. Surprise, surprise, the bus broke down. That's why we're now two hours late. According to Robin, we were going to have to wait another three and a half hours.

I knew there was something wrong with that bus! There was no suspension. There were no shocks. We were going over pebbles like we were drivivng through hard, mountainous terrain. I was not impressed. On to the mall!

We hit Bath and BodyWorks. Karen and Donna were in heaven. I was restrained. I knew I wasn't going to have the time I needed to do any real shopping. And I had already spent enough money in Macy's and Conway. I didn't need anymore debt. As Karen was checking out, I got a call -- the bus was fixed and will be coming in 15 minutes. Now, we had to make a mad dash back to Brooklyn.

It's now 4:45 pm. We got to Flatbush and Church and guess what? Still no bus. I'm like, what the heck? It was a very good thing that the next day was a holiday, 'cause anyhow I had to go to work, I would have been a different person. Believe me. Then the heavens opened, as if they were crying because of this comedy of errors, and it started to rain. And I started to weep. And there was no bus. And I was sad. And I wanted to go home and bathe (which I did get to do earlier in the day, hallelujah) and relax.

The bus never arrived until 5:30 pm. If I had known that, I would have had a very different Sunday. But, what was done was done. By the time everyone schlepped their tail on the bus, it was 6 pm. By the time we left NYC, it was 7 pm because we hit traffic on the bridge.

And traffic in Chinatown.

And traffic in the tunnel.

OK, I was vex, but I decided to make the most of the trip home. That's when they decided to blast the gospel video. Like, enough with the loudness. What happened to a peaceful ride? That's why people have walkmans and CD players. If I want to listen to music, I'll play some music, dammit.

Robin and I were chatting. Donna and Karen were chatting. The four of us were chatting and all having a decent time. The bus still had no shocks, but I was on my way home. I was going to get home at some ungodly hour of the morning, but at least I'd be home.

Night fell and we were driving. They're blasting the AC to the point I can see my breaths. I got mad. I went to the front of the bus to demand that the AC be turned off. Then the rain started. I prayed that we would drive through the rain safely and, all of a sudden, I feel wetness on my leg. No, it can't be. No... I didn't spend my hard earned money to drive on a leaky bus. The bus roof was leaking and my leg was soaked. What the heck kind of foolishness is this? So, I start to complain. The solution? Give me a garbage bag to wrap my leg in.

Yep. A garbage bag.

We got to the border at 4 am and I'm dog tired. The customs officer came on board (now, you remember what happened going down, right?) and I prayed. Lord, don't let these people play the ass. But the people had to play the ass, jeering and lying blatantly to the customs officer. OK, we all fib and underestimate how much we spent, but when you have five bags, plus liquor and a chandelier, even if it did come from Bobby's, you didn't spend $30. Man, just say you spent $100 and be done. Ms. Piggy, she pretended she couldn't speak English (her English was quite good when she was calling me stush). Another smart one snuck off the bus claiming her ID was in her luggage. Jackass, don't you know that you're supposed to keep those things on you? She came back on the bus soaked, looking guilty and the customs officer had to tear into her.

Lawd 'a' mercy.

The customs officer got vex and cussed us out, saying, "I will tear this bus apart if you don't tell me the truth." While she's speaking, Ms. Piggy and Rudy start chiming in. Donna got mad and cursed them out. The officer stormed off the bus and left us there to stew. The trip organizer then began to cuss the people asking them, "what's wrong with you? Is this your first time over the border? Tell the truth!"

Ten minutes later. The customs officer is back, asking the same questions. People are still trying to be shady and she had to call them out. It was only by the grace of God that we didn't get pulled off the bus and searched. We were off by 5 am. I never had that kind of experience at the border and I pray that I never have another one.

By 6:30 am, in the pouring rain, we were back in Toronto.

I will never do a bus trip again.

Everyone's on an adventure -- enjoy the journey

Welcome!

My first blog entry. Sigh. Why didn’t I know about blogs before? When I think about all the ideas, snarky comments and somewhat intelligent thoughts that went down the toilet because there was no quick and easy forum for expression, I get misty eyed.

But today is a new day.

I have a blog!

Well, being a blog virgin, this won’t have any particular theme. It’s just my rants about relationships, media, music, work, people, religion and life in general. What I like and what I don’t like, what bugs me and what I absolutely love! It’s the Urban Sista’s place to put on some Angie Stone and think about what’s going on and have a few people take a look.

Anyway, I will be back soon enough with some commentaries for your perusal.

Stay tuned!