The random thoughts of Urban Sista

“If it doesn’t fit, you must acquit” - RIP Johnnie Cochran
Since Johnnie got OJ off, I always said if I got in trouble with the law, I wanted Johnnie Cochran to be my lawyer. For real, because people were ready to crucify OJ and Johnnie got him off, playing what some people call the ‘race’ card. But, Johnnie knew that race always played a part in North American criminal justice.

Johnnie used the common sense card with ‘if it doesn’t fit, you must acquit.’ If the glove couldn’t get on OJ’s hand, no matter what Marcia Clark or Christopher Darden said or did, the fact remained, the glove didn’t fit. And as a critical piece of evidence, the prosecution was done.

Johnnie defended a lot of celebs – Sean ‘P. Diddy’ Combs, Todd Bridges and Michael Jackson – but he also defended the everyman, Abner Louima, Geronimo Pratt and Reginald Denny. And if Urban Sista was ever locked up, I was going to call on Johnnie. Now, me and all the rappers, gotta stay out of trouble ‘cause Johnnie’s not here to defend us.

Johnnie Cochran was one of the most feared Black men in America – not because he could beat you, but because he could and would beat you up in the courtroom to defend his client.

R.I.P. Johnnie, you will be missed. You can read the obituary, here.

What’s best for Terri?
This past weekend, I’ve talked and listened non-stop about the Terri Schiavo case. I pray that I’m never in a situation like the one that Terri’s parents and husband are in. It’s easy for people who aren’t involved to think this is a black and white decision – let her live or keep her alive.

It’s more than that.

The media is obviously siding with the parents of the brain-damaged woman and I see their point. She is their daughter and they want to keep her with them for as long as possible. Really, who wants to put their child in the ground and bury her – they prefer have some semblance of Terri than nothing at all. At least in this state, they can hold her and feel something… even if Terri doesn’t. Maybe that is selfish, but who can’t sympathize?

I’ve heard that the husband’s a scoundrel for getting involved with another woman or that he just wants the money. People, it’s been 15 years. Fifteen years of seeing his wife wither into a shell of herself. That’s hard. If it had been 15 days and he said, ‘remove the tube,’ I would have said that’s kinda cruel and quick. But 15 years? I guess he doesn’t see her getting any better and he thinks he’s doing what’s in her best interest – just like her parents think they are doing what’s in Terri’s best interest.

It’s very ironic that the very thing – starvation that made Terri’s body shut down 15 years ago – is what they are using to end to her life.

I don’t know if there is a positive outcome for this.

Why does the sister even bother?
I watched The Bachelor on Monday night and the sister was voted off. That’s not a reason to blog because I don’t know why a Black woman would go on these romantic reality TV shows because we don’t get that far. And that isn’t a bad things, ‘cause those relationships don’t work anyway.

But the reason for this blog isn’t that the sister was sent home on Monday night. I was at the ABC Bachelor forums and I read the reason the Black woman was sent home was that sisters are [INSERT EVERY VILE STEREOTYPE ABOUT BLACK WOMEN]. You can read some of the foolishness here and here (The one I really wanted to share I can't find and I can't be bothered to look any further, 'cause really, the show is ignorant and the bachelor is busted and smarmy.)

A Black person has a better chance being in the top two on The Apprentice or America’s Next Top Model, than hooking up with an all-American guy or girl – although it happens in every big North American city.

It’s one thing for interracial dating to happen in private, quite another for it to be on your TV screen each week. Could you imagine the uproar if Jen had been taped tonguing down a Black man in the limousine? Or if Andrew Firestone (white and with some dough) had proposed to a Black woman? As the boyfriend said, people were ready to riot when Terrell Owens and Nicollette Sheridan were pretending to have a tryst in a locker room.

Our society can’t handle the intermingling of races in their face in real life – or as real life as reality TV is. That’s why the brother or sister gets sent home early on in the show – not because they aren’t attractive or intelligent, but the networks know they’re will be hell to pay if that gets too far. Yes, it is about personal choice -- maybe the Bachelor or Bachelorette isn't down for interracial dating, but then, don't put the Black people on the show.

Meh. I'm putting too much thought into ol' dried up Charlie O'Connell and The Bachelor and their stupid rose ceremonies. FYI that boy is lying to us if he expects us to believe he's 29.

That's a hard looking 29, guy.

Urban Sista’s top 10 list of celebrities who are annoying as heck

I can’t sing and I’m not a celebrity, but I am subjected to them on a daily basis. Who left whom? Who is sleeping with whom? Who has beef with whom? Enough already! I don’t care what Gwyneth Paltrow named her baby as if she’s the only person who has ever given birth to a child or who’s Tom Cruise’s new woman. So, in honour of my annoyance with celebrity worship, here is my top 10 list of celebrities who are getting on my last nerve and need to go on with that mess.

Urban Sista’s top 10 list of celebrities who are annoying as heck (in alphabetical order):

50 Cent/The Game/all ‘gangster’ rappers. Stop being hardcore for a minute, sheesh. I’ve never seen a bunch of men look so cruel all the time -- look at Lloyd Banks, his mouth is forever pushed up. Whatever. Everyone has beef with everyone else, so we think, to sell records… until someone gets shot. What’s wrong with you guys? Really, I think they all need a good West Indian cut ass, because they get on as if this crap is really serious. Enough with the ignorance -- shooting people, perjuring yourself (you know who you are Li'l Kim) or starting coastal beef because you want to sell two records. Chupse.

Ashanti. Oh Ashanti, when will someone tell you that your narrow behind can’t sing? Now, on a faster track, and when she stops with all the ‘baby, baby!’ foolishness, she doesn’t sound half-bad. But when she tries to do a ballad, it’s over. She’s had a few decent tunes, Rain on Me and Happy, but the latest song, Only U? She should be slapped for that one. And how she’s using the song to hawk Herbal Essences shampoos – that’s only as bad as Beyoncé selling L’Oreal hair colour seeing she doesn’t have any hair… did you see the picture?

Avril Lavigne. Avril is a talented singer, musician and songwriter and I really don't have many problems with her -- except the child is always down about something. Brighten up, nuh? But, I would like to know why this little rich rock star is always complaining about the talents of others and ready to fight with Hilary Duff and the rest of the young’uns? She’s too hostile, that’s what the problem is. Always wanting to say how she’s more of an artist because she writes her own music – and? So? Does anyone besides you and a bunch of angry, angst-ridden teenagers care? It was just like back in my day when people where listening to Ani Di Franco vs. Spice Girls or something. Your audience of little people are the only people who care about your beef with Hilary or Lindsey Lohan. Hush your mouth and stop being so blaguardish.

Britney Spears. My Prerogative. Why? I was in shocked when I saw that mess on MuchMusic. We all know that Britney -- as pretty as she may be -- can't sing. So, why are you trying to remake a hit song? Next thing you know, Britney's going to be busting out The Weather Girls' It's Raining Men like poor Geri Halliwell (and you know girlfriend sounded like she needed a good meal). Britney, here's a word to the wise: don't try to remake any songs sung by people who sing better than you. That means, you can't sing anyone's songs beside your own... and maybe Ashanti's... and J.Lo's. I'm not going to even get into the marriage... but how you can tief way a pregnant woman's husband? And Kevin, how you can leave yuh girlfriend, big, big, big pregnant? Wunna deserve each other.

Cameron Diaz. Why are magazines trying to force me to think that Cameron Diaz is pretty? She was good-looking in The Mask, I’ll give her that, but girlfriend is busted. There is nothing attractive about her, nothing. And then hearing that she is one of the smelliest celebrities out there? Cameron needs more than designer clothes, she needs soap. I just heard that HDTV is going to mess up her career -- supposedly her skin isn't so hot up close and personal. Shame. Girl, you don't have to be drop dead gorgeous, just be a good actress. (And let me tell you how difficult it was to find a good picture of Cameron online -- one that isn't too far away.)

Jennifer Lopez. Sigh. J.Lo. If it’s not enough that people had to go through the whole Bennifer thing, we’re still being subjected to you and your excuse for singing. I like Get Right and I’ll dance to that bad boy, but the girl has only had two songs that sounded like anything. Every other song has had to have some rapper (Ja Rule, Fat Joe, Big Pun) all up in there to carry her no-tune having big booty. Dancing, yes. Acting? Hmm… yes. Singing? Please Lord, no. Did you hear Hold U Down? My Lord. That is the worst song in the history of song making.

Mariah Carey. Mariah has gone from bi-racial, to white to Black in less than 15 years. When the girl first came on the scene with Vision of Love, you couldn't hear your ear for her Venezuelan daddy and opera singing mom. Then, suddenly, Mariah went from being powerhouse singer with a little soul, to Celine Dion with a few more pounds. That was all good, Mariah could still bring down the house with her eight octave range. Suddenly, my girl started singing wack, breathy songs, sexing up her videos and doing bad movies (does anyone remember the name of that movie?). What happened to the music? The music became secondary to all the other nonsense and then, the breakdown. She never lied to Bone Thugs 'N Harmony. Mariah, stop with all the foolishness ('they're ash and I'm lotion' bit -- the boyfriend thinks it's a tight line. I think it's.. well, thank goodness the rest of the song is good) and get back to singing or just shut up.

Paris Hilton. This woman is the poster child for someone who has too much money. Paris’ face is all over the TV, tabloids, and the Guess? store at Scarborough Town Centre and she is annoying the heck out of me. Really, what can Paris do – what is her talent? Why do people spend so much time caring about what and who this woman is doing? I gotta give it to her, she’s smart. She is milking those 15 minutes of fame and dragging Nicole Ritchie along for the ride. Do your thing -- although you are working my nerves. But Paris, for the love of all things holy and decent, don’t make an album. I don’t think my ears could take it, especially after hearing Britney, Ashanti and J.Lo.

Russell Crowe. I don't usually have any issues with Russell Crowe -- he's a good actor, but I heard some news a couple of weeks that warranted Russell being on this list. Supposedly, Osama bin Laden and Al-Qaeda, wanted to kidnap poor Russell to destabilize the Australian cultural economy. Russell divulged this top secret information only a few weeks ago. [Rolling eyes] Look, what would bin Laden want with Russell Crowe? If bin Laden is so foolish to think that tiefin' way Russell Crowe was going to 'destabilize Australia's cultural economy' do you think he could have masterminded the 9/11 attacks? Why not steal Mel Gibson? Or maybe... the darned Prime Minister of Australia? Russell, don't believe your own hype. And if you do, don't tell the media.

Tiger Woods. Tiger and I go way back with this dislike (I have an old school dislike for Wesley Snipes as well, but I can't waste my time blogging about his tired behind). I really don't like Tiger and all of his 'cablasian' foolishness. The man is mixed race and that's cool, love who you are, but to hear that he said (and people said that his words were taken out of context) that he is 90 per cent Asian and 10 per cent Black? Tiger, you disappointed me. His dad told Oprah that he raised Tiger to be a part of the human race. Sigh. Mr. Woods, in a perfect world, that would be just fine, but in a world like the one we live in a person needs to know where he/she fits in whether you like it or not. When they don't know where they fit in, you start hearing them throw around made-up words like 'cablasian' or being shocked and unprepared to deal with the N-word (then again, who is ever prepared for that?). Both Tiger and his daddy need a slap -- moreso his daddy, 'cause Tiger didn't raise himself. One hard slap. Brother, you are bi-racial, accept yourself for who you are and stop talking foolishness.

101 things you should know about me

I just read SepiaDreams 101 things and I wanted to see if I could come up with my own list. I'm saying everyone's got a list but me, so here goes:

101 things you should know about me

1. I love to read
2. I love to write even more than I love to read
3. I’m still a nerd
4. I’m a nerd who knows about makeup, hair and the right clothing
5. If MAC was to cease existing, I would shed a tear
6. I like being a nerd
7. I refuse to go camping
8. I like four-star plus hotels
9. I would never backpack through anywhere
10. I like dogs
11. If I had one, I’d name him/her Barkleigh
12. I really do like my parents – but they do harass me sometimes
13. My family’s from Barbados
14. I’se a Bajan at heart!
15. Although I can talk a lot, I’m uncomfortable in many social settings
16. My sister and I are very different
17. But we’re more alike than we’d ever agree about
18. I am the cuter sister ;)
19. I sing in the shower
20. I would love to dance like Jennifer Lopez
21. I would love to sing like Whitney before the crack
22. I would love to fight like Buffy the Vampire Slayer
23. I like bothering my boyfriend
24. My belly is rounder than I would like it to be
25. I still look good in a tight top though – gotta hold that badboy in
26. I do admire my booty in mirrors
27. I like my legs
28. I don’t like to exercise
29. I love to eat
30. This sometimes causes a problem
31. I finished writing my book
32. Writing a book is a lot harder than you would think
33. I’m going to get it published
34. I’m a little worried that it won’t get published
35. I’m a fan of America’s Next Top Model
36. I do model poses after every episode, i.e. “This is what I would do if I was on ANTM!”
37. I’m too old to be on ANTM
38. I’m going to be 30 in five months
39. I used to think 30 was grown up
40. I’m looking forward to being 30
41. 30 is the new 20
42. I’m still a child at heart
43. I miss some of the friends that I don’t talk to anymore
44. But I remember why I don’t talk to them anymore and the missing evaporates
45. When I was younger, I didn’t like a lot of my friends
46. I hated high school with a passion
47. I loved my late 20s
48. When I’m done with you, I’m done
49. I’m very sensitive
50. I used to cry a lot
51. I don’t cry as much anymore
52. I’m a lot stronger than I appear
53. I love to laugh
54. I put on 106 & Park and I dance like I’m in a music video
55. I’ve always believed that something fantastic is going to happen in my life
56. I’m a Christian – meaning, I believe in Jesus Christ and I follow Him
57. If I ever get married, I don’t want a huge wedding
58. I want a huge ring, though ;)
59. I love yellow roses and peach roses
60. My bridal bouquet will be three calla lilies tied with a white ribbon
61. I don’t like spiders
62. I don’t mind snakes
63. I want to have babies
64. I want to have babies, but only if I’m married to the right person
65. I’m scared to actually birth a child
66. I pray that my parents live to see my children
67. Sometimes I fixate on death
68. I’ve never had surgery
69. I’ve never broken a bone
70. Which is surprising considering how clumsy I am
71. I’m forever hurting myself on something
72. I wore braces for two years
73. I nearly sawed off my thumb cutting a bagel back in the day
74. I’ve crushed on one guy for 10 years and never told him
75. I didn’t like my first boyfriend
76. I’ve been in very few romantic relationships
77. That fact use to bother me, but now I actually like that about me
78. I own rollerblades, but I don’t know how to use them
79. I miss my pet turtles Mel and Murphy
80. My contacts are sometimes more trouble than use
81. My belly button is pierced
82. It took forever to heal
83. I like it – it’s very much me
84. My favourite number is 7
85. I love Saturday afternoons in the summer
86. I watch too much reality TV
87. Summer is my favourite season
88. My dream vacation would be to spend a month in West Africa seeing where my foreparents lived and dreamed
89. I’ve never dated a white guy
90. I’ve had crushes on a few when I was in high school
91. I became quite militant in college
92. I was down with the Nation of Islam back in the mid ‘90s
93. One of the dudes at the Nation told me wanted ‘dark soil to plant my seed in’ – I stopped going to NOI meetings
94. I didn’t think The Da Vinci Code was all that it was cracked up to be
95. I know I’m smart
96. I never liked my first name – no one could spell it
97. It’s grown on me and it’ll look good on a book jacket
98. I’m learning to accept myself as is -- God isn't finished with me yet
99. It’s still hard because I’m not perfect (see #3 & #24)
100. I believe life is too short, but can be danged long if you make bad choices
101. I thank God for each day I get

Let's talk about race

I saw this article at Newsweek and thought that these guys are looking at race and race relations in a very interesting and honest way. No 'we love the world' business, they are cracking on Kanye West, Fred Durst and just talking about what's going on the way that you and I would. Check out the article.

Dang, I wish I had VH1. Guess I'll have to wait until it's on MuchMoreMusic.

Sigh.

Jetsgo's dead

See, I told you guys. After the Christmas fiasco (Part I & Part II), there was no way that Jetsgo was going to stay alive. Urban Sista is always right.

And, of course, during another one of the busiest travel times of the year, Jetsgo decides to ground their planes and strand passengers across the country.

No Real Cancun for poor Canadian spring breakers. I mean, how are people going to carry on bad in Miami and Cancun if they can't get there?

Chupse. I was watching CityTV and they had footage of airport employees going into Terminal 3 and taking down the Jetsgo signage. Imagine that you're at the airport, ready to board a plane to take you to your destination and you see that people are pulling down signs? Boy, if they thought there was ruckus at Christmas they're looking for a war today.

Any Jetsgo employees reading this blog, don't wear you uniform near Pearson -- there will be problems. Truthfully, I do have feelings for the employees of Jetsgo. Hopefully, they knew what was going down and were able to find employment elsewhere. Keep ya head up, folks!

Anyway, I guess it's better to be grounded before you leave than when you're trying to get back. Here's the Canadian Press story from the Toronto Star...

Grounded Jetsgo strands passengers
Westjet offers help after Jetsgo ceases operations, tells travellers to make other plans
CANADIAN PRESS

Discount airline Jetsgo announced early today that it is grounded, effective immediately.

Jetsgo advised customers to make alternative arrangements before heading to Pearson International Airport this morning because there will be no Jetsgo staff or planes available.
Travellers who are already away were told that their return tickets are no good and to make other arrangements to get home.

To make matters worse, it's the beginning of March break.

The company issued the stunning announcement shortly after midnight today.

The shutdown comes at the start of March break for many school systems across Canada, when hordes of families flock to Florida, Mexico and other sunspots served by the airline — one of the busiest travel times of the year.

“We deeply regret that this had to happen. The decision to cease operations was only taken after difficult deliberation,” said Jetsgo president Michel Leblanc.

Jetsgo said that difficult market conditions and competitive pressures led the company to discontinue operations and ground all of its planes.

“We are very concerned about our customers and the significant hardship that this action causes. In the meantime, we encourage our passengers to contact their travel agent or an alternative airline.”

A spokesman for arch-rival WestJet said the carrier would do its best to take care of Jetsgo passengers.

“I’m sure there’s going to be some who are a little upset, who bought Jetsgo tickets, and I certainly think we’re going to do whatever we can to make sure we accommodate everybody we possibly can,” operations vice-president Tim Morgan said from Calgary.

“We would hate to leave people stranded anywhere, so we’ll do what we can.”

Air Canada spokeswoman Laura Cooke said the timing of Jetsgo’s failure would make it tough to find seats for extra passengers.

“Obviously, the problem at this time of year is that the aircraft are already flying rather full because . . . of March break,” Cooke said.

Air Canada cannot honour Jetsgo tickets but said it would try to make more aircraft and seats available for Jetsgo passengers to purchase.

Jetsgo had at least 18 flights scheduled to leave Toronto’s Pearson’s Airport — Canada’s transport hub — this morning, including domestic, U.S. and Mexican destinations.

There were at least 10 flights scheduled to land at Pearson on Monday morning from Canadian cities coast to coast.

Hours after the company issued its release, its website was still active with no note to travellers on the situation.

The company said in its statement that consumers who have paid for Jetsgo tickets should communicate with the Canadian Transportation Agency or provincial consumer affairs ministries.

Recent problems at the discount airliner built up something of a backlash against the company, even leading some travellers to launch a website — www.jetsgosucks.com.

The site documents one person’s bad travel experience with Jetsgo and has a section with discussion forums, with more than 200 topics dealing with the airline.

The airline had several problems with cancellations this winter, stranding hundreds of passengers during one heavy snowfall.

And the federal Air Travel Complaints Commission said that while the gripes it received about all airlines had fallen last year, Jetsgo bucked the trend by disappointing its customers more than it had in the previous year.

Air Travel Complaints Commissioner Lacroix Kenniff expressed doubt about how the company was handling the criticism.

“I . . . have some concerns about the way in which Jetsgo deals with the complaints it receives,” she said last October.

Jetsgo also had problems with Transport Canada last month over deficiencies in its flight manuals, which led to it having an operating certificate revoked.

That forced the airline to fly at 28,000 feet instead of between 29,000 and 41,000 feet, a costly move that made flights less efficient for fuel consumption.

In today’s statement, Jetsgo said it would be asking that Quebec Superior Court immediately grant it protection under the Companies’ Creditors Arrangement Act.

Leblanc founded the privately held company in June 2002 from the ashes of Canada 3000 Inc., which collapsed after the Sept. 11, 2001, terror attacks battered its business and it faced rising competition.

Leblanc had run a successful charter carrier, Montreal-based Royal Airlines, but he sold it to Canada 3000 and became a senior executive with the expanded company before leaving in a dispute with Canada 3000’s management.

She's a bad mama jama

Right on, daddy! Show you right! Don't mess wid these here bad mama jamas -- they're a whole lotta women!

Be Happy - Mary J. Blige

Lawd, people, it's been a while, huh? All this training and ting, has made me a lethargic blogger, but, thankfully, I'm back at my desk, enjoying my regular job. Back to blogging I go...

How can I love somebody else

If I can't love myself enough to know

When it's time,

Time to let go

Sing

All I really want

is to be happy

And to find a love that's mine

It would be so sweet

- Be Happy, Mary J. Blige

Ahhh... Mary. That's my girl. Back in the day, I would rock her My Life cassette on the way to work, school and home. Poor Mary was always going through some kinda drama -- K-Ci terrorizing her backside, drug abuse, emotional abuse...

My life was never as dramatic as Mary's, but I could have rivalled her misery -- at least in my 20-year-old mind.

At the beginning of my 20s, I was totally and only concerned with what people thought of me. Was I cool enough, pretty enough, funny enough -- I spent so much time worrying my head about being what someone else wanted me to be, I was miserable constantly.

I dated guys I wasn't really, truly interested in. I tried to be the person they wanted me to be so that they would stay interested in me. And everytime I did or said something that was out of my character, I would feel like I lost a piece of myself.

And my misery would grow and become consuming.

At about age 26, after a couple of so-called romances -- if you could even call them that -- lord, the things you learn after you stop talking to someone. Ladies, if you mention a man's name and three out of four women bawl out, "You were talking to him too!" or "I know him!" or "Good grief, he gets around!" You understand what I'm saying.

I was tired of being tired about the state of affairs in my love life (it's always about the love life, isn't it?). I had a good job, I was travelling, I had friends that cared about me -- so what if the man wasn't there? Maybe I need to work on me, 'cause if all I'm attracting is bigheaded boys, something has got to change.

I needed to change. I needed to become the person who I was and get rid of all the other crap that was crowding me out. So, I was on a man embargo for almost two years... it's not to say the brothers were knocking down my door trying to get to me and I had to wave them off. It was nothing like that.

That didn't even matter.

I wasn't thinking about romance -- I was thinking about me. I was happy getting to know myself. And yes, it may sound corny and Oprah-ish, but I learned to love me and appreciate me. I figured out who I was and I wasn't going to compromise for anyone because I loved myself more than I loved the idea of being with someone.

So, going out and not having someone check me wasn't a big deal. Hearing my girlfriends talk about their relationship drama was ok because I didn't want to be with anyone until I met the right person. I wasn't stressed out about what other people thought -- I took myself out to dinner at a nice Japanese restaurant. I stayed home and watched movies, not 'cause I was alone, but because I was happy hanging out with myself.

There were some days I did feel alone and wished there was that special someone for me to go out with. But thankfully, the misery only lasted a day or two, not for weeks.

All of this chatting to say, at some point, you have to come to love yourself and the state that you're in. Because, unfortunately, you can't make someone love you and you shouldn't base your feelings on what anyone says or does. Never let anyone else control how you feel about yourself. Once you learn to truly love the person God created you to be, someone else will love you.

I'm going to be 30 in a few months and I say "Hallelujah!" I thank God for getting older and the little wisdom I've gained over the years. I should say, the little wisdom God has bestowed on me, 'cause I was really a hot mess back in the day... heck, I'm probably a hot mess now, but I know how to hide it better. Maybe it isn't age -- maybe it's maturity... whatever. I'm just glad that I'm not the chick I used to be.

And now, I am happy ;)