Bathroom Broughtupcy

You'd be surprised to know that I work with a bunch of hardback women the way they keep the washroom so nasty.

No, really, it's absolutely ABHORRENT how the bathroom looks worse than the one I used to scorn when I was in elementary school years and years ago. These 20- and 30-something women need some so-and-so bathroom manners.

On the regular, I'm disgusted by the lack of manners in public washrooms. People don't flush. They don't look back. They don't give two hoots that I have to walk in on their foulness. Was that how they were raised? Is that how they act at home?

You know who I'm talking about: the woman who marches out of the bathroom stall, fixes her hair and her makeup and waltzes out of the bathroom without WASHING HER HANDS. That's not just nasty, it's a good way to spread disease. Remember SARS? I don't joke with that mess, that's why there is a big, able bottle of Purell on my shelf.

Or the one who walks out of the bathroom without flushing the toilet. How can you forget to flush the toilet? If you know, please, send me an e-mail, 'cause that is the first thing you do after you pull up your pants or push down your skirt. For goodness sake, when you're going to use a public bathroom, flush the toilet. And make sure it's flushed properly.

But I save my real venom for this one, you know her, I'm sure you do. The washroom is empty, aside from you. Someone comes in and decides to go in the stall right next to you although there are others available. And, it just so happens, her belly is on fire, so noises and smells are emanating from the stall. Yeah, the one right next to you.

I understand sometimes things need to be handled, but you don't need to be beside me. Especially if there is no one else in the damned bathroom. Isn't their bathroom etiquette which states there must be at least one stall between us?

Have some pity on me, nuh.